The One About Self Care

I wanted to share a bit of admin based self care I just did...

It is not embarrassing to put in safe boundaries and the more we practice it, the easier it becomes. Safe boundaries for us and our kids ARE self care.. we need to do this for ourselves so our kids can also learn by example..

This was my response to an invite to a 'Thank You' event I was invited to for some work I do with a public organisation.

"Thank you so much for the invite. I think it is a great idea and lots of people will have a great time, but I will not be able to attend because of my PTSD, and my needs as an Autistic ADHD adult. I cannot be around people I don't know unless related to my work or for my children to attend things, I don't like being near food that others are touching or near people eating, I don't like speaking to other about my experience of abuse, except in a voluntary/work support capacity, I would be triggered by anyone in police uniform and I do not like small talk, I would be so anxious about all the unknowns that I would be in constant fight or flight and would not really then take in any of the lovely things the day would hold....so really it is just not my thing, but I thank you for putting it on for others and I appreciate being invited.

I am not sure if it would be possible, but if I could receive a film of the speaking at the event, or watch a live feed on the day, I would really like that, but I know it may not be possible in terms of confidentiality. If not, just a transcript from the speakers would be great and any photos of the day. I love looking at photos of food and people having fun, this is how I find joy in regards to these types of events.

Have a lovely day and please know this is not a sadness to me, but a really positive step for me to put in those boundaries to keep myself emotionally and physically safe.

I hope you have a wonderful time and I have lots of ideas for collaboration moving forward and look forward to doing lots more in the coming year."

It is OK to tell people about what you need.. Children are taught too often to be polite and fit in boxes and we grow into adults who suffer from that.. I am not saying we train an army of rebels.. in our kids.. but self care and self protection need to be key to all families.