Masking and an inability to attend school.. (I hate the term ‘school refusal’ as it’s like adults having a vomiting virus and a boss saying they are refusing to work..)
It’s strange when you get to read a full set of reports, as we do daily. I have an appeal case at the moment where the parent and health views are so similar and then in school the child presents completely differently. Apart from the name and date of birth, it could be a different child.
In almost all cases we see children are masking to some extent at school. I see it when I’m delivering respite and enabling too. Confirming to me in different settings for everyone is important. We all behave differently in the gym than in a 5star restaurant, but masking is an entirely different thing.
Children who are telling school they are happy and fine, then coming home and having meltdowns, attacking themselves and others, self harming, suicidal..
How can this be better understood in...
You are the Captain.
Having a child is the start of a journey.
It is a never ending journey. You board the boat when they are born and you just have to keep paddling.
For a family who are dealing with services and Local authorities, Education welfare officers, teachers, professionals, it’s like being on the boat and going through constant rapids and having random folk on shore shouting at you, giving you advice. Sometimes it’s helpful, sometimes it makes it harder to navigate. Sometimes you feel like the boat has hit land and you get stuck, but you are still on the journey and the boat will move again.
The thing is, once you realise this journey has no end, no finish line, it can make the journey easier to bare, because you slow down and start to find small wins along the way.
When I first became a loan parent I felt like my copilot had jumped ship. I didn’t feel like I could cope, I begged and prayed for someone new to join me. I became low and angry. But I...